As I gear up for baby any day now (no, he’s still not named), I am particularly inspired by the #2 rule of French parenting, as brought to you by Bringing Up Bebe:
Le Pause is a deceptively simple strategy employed, it seems, as a natural and instinctual part of French parenting. Le Pause allows French parents to enjoy babies who sleep through the night at 2 or 3 weeks old, babies who are content to snuggle alone in their cribs, babies who, as if by magic, learn to soothe themselves.
What is this great and powerful tool, you ask?
Please, please, for the love of all that is good, what is it??
You guys are going to hate me. Either that, or you have already been using Le Pause in some shape or form with much success and will wonder, “Yeah, what’s so secret about that?”
Le Pause is simply that.
We’re talking in the middle of the night, or in the afternoon, anytime 24/7–simply not rushing to your baby’s side the instant he/she makes a noise or stirs.
We’re talking pausing and letting him or her learn to work things out for themselves.
We’re not talking about letting a baby scream and cry, but simply giving him a minute or two to adjust, to realize his surroundings, to decide if he really needs us.
We’re talking giving babies a little breathing room.
Employing Le Pause would look a little something like this:
2:00 AM. Baby boy stirs, whimpers a little.
I lumber out of my sleep, ready to swoop in with all of my maternal mama ways. Oh, and my milk.
The husband reaches out, stops me by lightly grabbing my arm.
“Wait a sec,” he whispers. “See if he’ll go back to sleep.”
So we wait, listening to him rustle in his bassinet beside our bed, watching him look around in wonder at the moonlight streaming in. He takes it all in, his eyelids becoming heavier and heavier as he drifts off again for a few more blessed hours.
That would be a miracle, no?
I’m sure it won’t exactly go down like that, and I’m sure my baby, like my others, will want to eat around the clock, but I do plan on trying this a bit more than I have in the past. I’ve pretty much believed in the thought that if a baby wakes up at all, he/she needs something and I need to provide it. Usually, in the form of a diaper change and a feeding. But it makes a lot of sense to me to allow a baby time to go through those awake/sleep cycles without rushing in, to let him learn that he is safe, to learn to adjust on his own.
It’s not like it’s rocket science.
It’s just a little…
Anyone out there already use a form of Le Pause? What do you think about it? Is it good to let a baby learn to soothe, or do you believe a baby needs to be picked up instantly?